Copyright © Dan Blair 2020.
One of the most useful tools for communication is the adage “agree to disagree.” Many do not find it okay to disagree so arguments ensue. By contrast, if you can agree to disagree it eases empathy, invites insight, bolsters boundaries, and attains agreements for the future.
If the goal of communication is to feel understood and cared for, use CAB.
C larify what the other person is saying or feeling, or make sense of what they are thinking, and allow them to disagree. You do not need agreement in opinions to make agreements for the future.
A sk for what you are wanting, or ask the other person to make sense of what you are feeling.
B oundaries make clear what you are not willing to do, but end with what you are willing to do. Meet in the middle.