Christian

Disappointment in God?

How would you answer these questions:

When I am struggling, I think God __________.

When I am suffering, God responds by __________.

When I fail, God feels __________ toward me.

When I feel angry or vindictive, God __________.

 

Faith-Based Counseling is Available

Blair Counseling offers Biblically-based counseling as an option to wrestle with questions like:

Does God really intervene in life, in my life?

What if my spiritual life is empty?

What if my spouse has different spiritual values than me?

How can faith strengthen relationships, or help with depression or anxiety?

Some look to their faith in God in their happiest or awe-struck moments, or some lean on their faith in their lowest or darkest moments.  Some turn to their faith “just in case it’s true,” and some long for a relationship with a powerful God. Some “just know or feel” that He is real, and others have found “facts” which undergird their faith. Benefits exist for believing in God, and for not believing in God. Others would never go back to their belief in God.

Beyond one’s personal experience, spirituality can also be tied to science and history. One question that is explored from the scientific perspective is how do you get life from non-life? Also, the age of the earth is debated through the study of radiometric dating, the influx of salts into the ocean, the rate of decay of the earth’s magnetic field, the growth rate of human populations, and other examples. (One’s answer depends on one’s assumptions about the uniformity of natural law, uniformity of process, uniformity of rate and uniformity of outcome). Some assume there is a God and explain science and history from that assumption, and some assume that the existence of God cannot be determined.

Others look to the Bible for information on both the origins of our world, and their faith.  The Biblical account can be construed as an allegory or history. Hebrew expert Dr. Steven Boyd concludes it is history.  He writes, “For Genesis 1:1-2:3, this probability is between 0.999942 at a 95% confidence level. Thus, we conclude with statistical certainty that this text is narrative, not poetry. It is therefore statistically indefensible to argue that it is poetry. The hermeneutical implication of this finding is that this text should be read as other historical narratives . . . ” (Dr. Steven Boyd, Associate Professor of Bible, The Master’s College, Radioisotopes and the Age of the Earth, Volume II, editors Larry Vardiman, Andrew Snelling, and Eugene Chaffin).

Some Bible-believers believe that the beginning of Genesis is an allegory or that a “day” in Genesis is actually a longer period of time.  A complication for those who believe that creation is millions of years old is that in the fossil remains of rock layers, there is evidence of death, suffering, and disease. This contradicts the Bible’s assertion that God’s creation before the first man Adam’s sin was “very good,” (Gen. 1:31), and perfect (Duet. 32:4) and that death came into the world through sin (1 Corinthians 15:21; Romans 8:20-22; Romans 5:12).

Others take a historical and a legal approach to look for the preponderance of the evidence in determining the existence and impact of Christ, or other figureheads. They ask questions about Christ, for example, who claimed to be God. Is Jesus crazy, a master manipulator, or stable? How did the Christian movement develop quickly, with its founders who quickly transitioned from fear to a willingness to die for their beliefs in Christ? Are the records trustworthy?

Faith will continue to be a source of comfort. Loss of faith is associated with distress. If God is real, and He offers a interactive relationship, such a relationship is attained through faith. Evidence can be found for the existence of God, or against Biblical claims about God. Evidence cannot be found against a god, but perhaps against a particular definition of God. Often the evidence found reflects one’s personal preference. The existence of suffering though, is not debated. Where the responsibility lies for the suffering though, continues to be debated.

 

Christian Counseling

Blair Counseling and Mediation values a Christian approach to complex issues facing families. Claiming a healthy marriage, stopping divorce, or living through a divorce without it destroying the family, and helping children in a world of high pressure and temptation is our priority. The Bible has approaches to depression, anxiety and substance use that work across time and cultures, and are not outdated. More importantly a clear path to God is found through Jesus Christ. A relationship with Him is the basis for mental health. We believe that spirituality as an essential element of mental health.

To most people, God is an inference, not a reality. He is a deduction from evidence which they consider adequate; but he remains personally unknown to the individual.

For it is not mere words that nourish the soul, but God himself, and unless and until the hearers find God in personal experience, they are not the better for having heard the truth.

—A. W. Tozer

 

Church Conflict

Research by the Barna Group uncovered two surprising facts: (1) the majority of the nation’s non-churched are comprised of people, not who say they are not Christians, but who say they are, and (2) about 4 out of 10 of these stopped attending due to a “painful” or “negative” ordeal. Barna projected that at the current drop-out rate attendance nationally will be half of what it is today in 15 years.

Research shows that there is a direct correlation between conflict and attendance: the more conflict a church has the fewer people remain in attendance. To address this growing problem churches need an in-house system which conveys to its members that the church is able and willing to gracefully and effectively address disputes as they emerge, for the good of all. One such program based on a Biblical model is the Judeo-Christian Model of Peacemaking developed by Dr. Ken Newberger. Its application in local congregations is detailed in his book entitled, Hope in the Face of Conflict. This practical step-by-step process looks to the pattern God used to make peace with us. It is based on love as the first foundation, justice the second, with reconciliation the goal and mediation the means.

Here’s a question: According to the Judeo-Christian Model of Peacemaking (JCMP), when parties are in conflict, who is supposed to make the first move toward reconciliation, and what does that first move consist of?

Because the Judeo-Christian Model is based on the pattern that God used to make peace with us, the first question really is this:  In God’s conflict with mankind (due to human sin), who made the first move toward reconciliation, the offended party or the offending party?  The answer is, God, the offended party, did.  More specifically, he created a mediatorial structure in both the Old and New Testaments by which peace with mankind could be established. Since the undergirding framework is “like Father, like Son,” if you are in conflict with another and are the offended party, you have the responsibility to make the first move toward resolution and reconciliation.

For churches or families devoted to a biblical process to resolve conflict but torn asunder by unresolved issues, please contact Dan Blair at Blair Counseling and Mediation. or Dr. Kenneth Newberger at resolvechurchconflict.com.

 

Support for Pastors at No Cost
The burdens that pastors carry are many. Dr. Greg Smalley reports that 80 percent of pastors leave the ministry within five years of graduating seminary. He adds that 1500 pastors a month leave due to burnout or moral failure.  Dr. Mark McMinn through his data-based method of church consultation shared ten burdens pastors face.

 

  1. Role conflicts.  Pastors get asked to do many things above and beyond the job description.
  2. Proliferation of activities.  New endeavors are started without adequate support for the programs already in place.
  3. Administrative duties.  Pastors are not necessarily trained in spread sheets.
  4. Spiritual dryness.  People face deserts in life, but pastors are not expected to be “people.”
  5. Perfectionism or inadequacy.  Pastors can hold unrealistic standards for themselves.
  6. Unrelenting standards.  Others can hold unrelenting standards for the pastor.
  7. No time to be alone, while feeling alone or lonely.  Both can be true.
  8. Intrusions on time.  The unexpected often occurs at inopportune times.
  9. Failure of dreams.  Often visions don’t occur as planned.
  10. Blocked goals.  Attempts at accomplishment are meant with resistance.

In addition, pastors most often use an intrapersonal coping style versus interpersonal coping.  Balancing coping strategies means pastors need their own support system.  Blair Counseling and Mediation offers wellness checks and personal support for the unique stressors that pastors face at no cost as part of our commitment to the local church.  Please contact Dan Blair at Blair Counseling and Mediation..