March 1st, 2012
Supervised visitation is centered on facilitating a relationship between the children and both parents. If both parents are present for visitation the positive message it sends to the kids is powerful. It says that the kids are more important than our differences. It says that parents will work together to create a sense of safety. It gives the kids a sense of peace that parents will be okay and that a relationship with each parent will be okay. It is a chance at consistent and calm interaction. Read the rest of this entry »
Posted in alienation, child's best interest, children, Divorce Mediation, estranged parent, ongoing conflict, parenting agreement, Supervised Visitation, undermining parent | 1 Comment »
September 8th, 2011
To say that a parent’s attachment to his or her kids is strong may be a negative statement. Attachment is described as secure and insecure, so it is possible to have a strong attachment that is insecure. Read the rest of this entry »
Posted in attachment, children, Divorce Mediation | 1 Comment »
August 31st, 2011
There’s no one cause to divorce. Researchers point to a spike in divorce between five and seven years of marriage due to high conflict and between ten and twelve years due to loss of intimacy and connection. Read the rest of this entry »
Posted in Divorce Mediation, save marriage, Unwanted Divorce | No Comments »
August 29th, 2011
Attachment is a kind of bond that endures over time. It is primarily developed the first to third year of life, but that is not the only chance to develop attachment. Attachment figures are those who meet needs of the child especially in times of distress. Attachment shapes a child’s nervous system. Read the rest of this entry »
Posted in attachment, children, court-ordered counseling, Divorce Mediation, parenting, parenting agreement | No Comments »
August 23rd, 2011
Working with the Court in managing chaotic situations involving children and counseling is challenging and requires an additional set of skills. This article should help to evaluate court-involved counseling. It is important to know how counseling will affect the legal process and how the legal process will affect counseling. Read the rest of this entry »
Posted in alienation, child's best interest, children, court, court-ordered counseling, custody, Divorce Mediation, estranged parent, legal processes, ongoing conflict, Parent Coordination and Parent Coordinator, Reunification Therapy | 1 Comment »
January 4th, 2011
Parenting coordination is a future trend and a viable option to custody battles. When parents are not able come to an agreement regarding their children a parent coordinator will mediate the issue. If parents are still not able to come to an agreement a parent coordinator gathers information to make a decision in the child’s best interest. Read the rest of this entry »
Posted in child's best interest, Divorce Mediation, ongoing conflict, Parent Coordination and Parent Coordinator, parenting agreement | 2 Comments »
December 27th, 2010
Much of the time one parent does not realize what they are doing. The effect on the kids is unnoticed. It is usually experienced by the child as stress, tension, anxiety, guilt and depression. Kids may act out or hide it. Parents usually justify it.
What is “it?” On the moderate side it is undermining the other parent and it can lead to alienation. Read the rest of this entry »
Posted in alienation, children, complaints about other parent, Divorce Mediation, how to tell the kids, parenting, undermining parent | 3 Comments »
September 22nd, 2010
Parenting after divorce presents new challenges. Each parent will have their own rules and approach. The kids have to learn that mom and dad’s house is different. The rule remains though that both parents will have better outcomes if they back each other up.
Often when one thinks of disciplining kids you think of angry exchanges with both sides feeling frustrated and misunderstood. Read the rest of this entry »
Posted in Divorce Mediation, parenting | 3 Comments »
September 22nd, 2010
Telling the kids is often described as the toughest part of a divorce. The kid’s dream of a “normal” life with mom and dad loving each other dies hard. There is much lost even in a “good divorce” so make sure divorce is unavoidable. Research says that ongoing conflict or an unloving home can be worse than a divorce, so it is important to understand the kids’ point of view. For example, consider these lyrics by Tom Delonge:
Their anger hurts my ears
Been running strong for seven years
Rather than fix the problems
They never solve them
It makes no sense at all
I see them everyday
We get along, so why can’t they?
If this is what he wants
And this is what she wants
Then why is there so much pain?
Read the rest of this entry »
Posted in complaints about other parent, how to tell the kids, parenting | 1 Comment »
